This Weekend in Sports

Watching sports was about all I did this weekend. There was rugby, basketball, soccer, and football. Of course, there were also random bouts of homework, sleep, and drinking. This weekend began the Six Nations Rugby Tournament between England, France, Italy, Wales, Ireland and Scotland. Ireland didn't do so well in the Rugby World Cup this summer, which has given everyone some sort of complex and made this tournament of vital importance to the national honor. Sam, Nicole, and I went down to The Barge to catch the rugby matches on Saturday.

Ireland 16 - 11 Italy
This was not a good result, despite what you may think. Italy are apparently the whipping-boy of this tournament, and as previously mentioned there was a lot riding on this game. I saw interviews with people on the street leaving Croke Park, and the words "ghastly" and "rubbish" were used in excess. More than one fan called for the sacking of the manager. I can say that after watching Munster (a province of Ireland) dismantle Wasps in the Heineken Cup (a club tournament), and given the fact that Munster's players feature heavily in Ireland's squad, I expected to see more quality, but the players just didn't have the same individual performances. Ireland has a tough game next weekend away at France. Expect more calls for blood over this one.

England 19 - 26 Wales
Wales had not won at Twickenham, England's rugby ground, in twenty years. England's kicker, an integral position that scores most of the points in the match because they take frequent penalty kicks and conversion kicks, is Jonny Wilkinson, one of the most famous rugby players in the world. Ironically, it was Wales' kicker, James Hook, who won it for Wales by never missing a kick. England seem a bit off-form from finishing second in the Rugby World Cup.

Scotland 6 - 27 France
This game was a national disaster in Scotland. Some had them picked to win, and as the scoreline suggests they completely had themselves. France, who had a very successful World Cup run, changed their squad quite a bit and appear to have done so wisely. Not much else to say here other than that Scotland need to sort themselves out.

Manchester United 1 - 1 Tottenham Hotspur
This match was on on one screen in the pub we were watching rugby in. Every few minutes I would run down the stairs and catch a few minutes, then run back. There were a group of Indians and old men wearing red who were watching this game, one of whom would gesture and curse violently, as United were complete crap until the last ten minutes. After conceding a goal on a defensive disaster, United failed to connect passes or coordinate any attack to speak of. Only a late flurry, culminating in a 93rd minute equalizer on a corner-kick, leveled the score. Strangely, as bad as we looked, when I saw Van Der Sar come out of goal for the corner, I had an odd feeling that we would punch it in. We made a racket after the goal. Lucky we did, as Arsenal have re-taken the lead and will be unlikely to drop points anytime soon.

Tennessee 76 - 71 Mississippi State
This was a rather frustrating game to watch, much less to stay up for. After overcoming an opening barrage by MSU, we built up a 17-pt lead. Our 3-point shooting was frighteningly good, and we were responding well to MSU's highly rated defense. Then, as the second half started to wind down, State decided to start throwing up 3's with reckless abandon.
It's something I'd like to call the "Patrick Lazear Strategy." For those of you who don't know Patrick, my good friend of a past age who now goes to UK, he was able to merge two of his favorite things - basketball and lazy fatalism. According to Daniel, who used to play against Patrick's team in a YMCA league, when Patrick's team, for which he accounted roughly 75% of the points, got down by a large margin, Patrick would stand at half court, refuse to play defense, receive the first pass of his team's possession, and throw up a 3-point shot. All the while ignoring the screamed threats of his mother (also the coach), to take him out.
Realizing they had little chance to win by conventional means, the Devil-may-care Bulldogs simply started throwing up any three ball they could squeeze off, and, probably by virtue of the Devil, they all went in. Suddenly, after something like a 24-9 run, our lead had blown away like the topsoil of the central United States in the late 1920s. When legendarily awful free-throw shooter Wayne Chism bricked his first foul shot in the closing minutes, all looked lost. However, largely thanks to some clutch fouls shots by Jordan Howell and a pathetic traveling penalty by an MSU freshman, we came away with the win.
We need to learn not to take our foot off the gas, but its hard to know what to do when Satan is guiding the hands of the opposing team's shooters.

Giants 17 - 14 Patriots
Last night was a riot in more ways than one. We had a few dozen people over to our apartment for a shindig, as our apartment is bigger than everyone else's. Somewhat nonsensically, we cleaned up the place diligently before the party, only to have it completely destroyed by the drunken throngs. Nicole and I made some nacho dip, which thankfully allowed me to shut myself up in the kitchen during the opening rounds of the fracas, which started a bit too early before the 11pm kickoff.
This morning, the bathtub was filled with empty beer cans, the bookshelf was placed firmly in the middle of the hall, and the kitchen floor had a nice coating of honey. I'll leave the explanation for these conditions up to your imagination. At least tonight, Chris didn't get hit by a taxi.
As for the game, I'm still somewhat in disbelief. Yesterday, my roommate and Patriots fan Sam asked my why I didn't just support the Patriots, "to save myself the heartache of loss." I was amused by the seductiveness of this argument, calling up images of Emperor Palpatine, Sauron, or Pacino in The Devil's Advocate. Though I was not awake to see Sam's reaction at the end of the game, I can attest that he has taken the loss like a man, without any whining or grasping irrational excuses. He did skip work today though to recuperate.
As far as the Patriots themselves go, I'm delighted to see some justice for the smug pompousness that has emanated out of Foxboro this season. I'm also glad to see that cutoff-hoodie-wearing asshole Belichik fail in any capacity. Perhaps Tommy Brady will impregnate another starlet to blow off steam, then leave her when someone hotter comes along. The fact that the damage was wreaked by a Manning makes it even better. Of course everyone expected it to by Peyton, but obviously any Manning will suffice. The Patriots' opponents should hire Archie as a consultant and have Cooper suited up ready to come in for a few plays at backup.
Bill Simmons picked the Patriots 42-17. Shows what he knows. Supposedly the Patriots invited some of the Giants to their after-party before the game. Perhaps the '72 Dolphins should have invited the Patriots to their after-party.

Stay tuned for a Super Tuesday reaction...